The goal of parenting is to help our children become responsible adults. To achieve this goal, parents help children learn about life and living in today’s society. The time parents spend with their children is important. Children need to be loved unconditionally. Doris Curran, a parent educator, says the cry of children today is, “Love me for who I am, not what I do. Love me for being, caring, sharing, and erring, not winning, placing, and showing.” That does not mean that we have to approve of everything a child does. What it does mean is that even though the child misbehaves, we still love and accept the child and provide support. Talk with children Spend time talking with children. Talk about any topic of interest to both of you. Talk about the day’s events and the child’s feelings about them. Through observation and interaction with parents, children learn how to communicate. Children learn to express their needs. They learn to listen. They learn to understand nonverbal clues. Life’s lessons Children learn about families from the time they spend in their own families. They learn about birth and caring for another person when a new baby comes home from the hospital. They learn about loss when a family member dies. They learn about marriage and relationships by watching their mothers and fathers interact. By living in a family, children learn to share, how to stand up for their own rights, and how to love another person. Building self-esteem Parents help children develop positive self-esteem by communicating the value they feel for them. Words of encouragement and love help provide children with the courage to try new things without worrying excessively about not being able to succeed. Growing up with trust Children learn about trust at home from their parents. They learn trust from being trusted. When parents trust children to accomplish a task on their own, they learn that they can do the task. Give guidance Parents help children learn to be more responsible when they help them learn to control their own behavior. A disciplined person has the ability to decide what appropriate behavior is and to act accordingly. Parents use discipline to help guide their children as they become responsible adults. Take the time to make discipline a learning experience. Appropriate discipline should include four parts. Children need to understand: 1) What behavior is not acceptable 2) Why it is not acceptable 3) What behavior is appropriate 4) Why it is appropriate By helping children understand why something they did was unacceptable, they can learn what acceptable behavior is. There is no one right way to train children. A variety of discipline techniques exist. What is important is a warm and loving relationship between parents and children. Article courtesy of Motivated! magazine. Used with permission.
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[We] asked: What are our values as a family? What do we really believe? What is important to us? We came up with four words: gratitude, generosity, humility, and courage. We determined that we want those four values to define who we are as a family, and for Parker [my oldest son] and I, who we are as men. So, I am always conscious of how do we cultivate gratitude. How do we model generosity? How do we stay humble and keep learning and stay hungry for more of God? And how do we live courageously? You cannot obey the will of God and not be courageous. That’s why God said to Joshua, “Be strong and courageous,” because if you are going to experience and stake claim to the promises of God, you are going to have to be courageous. Those four words are words that begin to define us as a family. They are things I want to impress upon my children.--Mark Batterson * If you haven’t done this already, it’s a good idea to give some thought to what your personal or family core values are—to determine the ideals that fundamentally guide your personal choices, that represent the Christ-life and integrity that you want to demonstrate, and that you feel will lead to your having a full and purposeful life. There are any number of ways to express your personal values and priorities. Some people do it in list form, keeping the points brief. Others write a personal mission statement. Some express what they feel identifies them as a person, the aspects of their life and goals that are most important to them. Even if you haven’t previously given this serious thought, everybody has values or principles that fundamentally play into their decisions and thought processes, even subconsciously, and that are part of making them who they are, that form the fiber of their character. If you give this some thought and prayer, you’ll probably be able to recognize certain threads in your actions and thinking, points that you continually factor in to your decisions or base your decisions on, and this can help you to identify what values are core to you. You might also recognize some points that you haven’t given the proper priority to, or factors that need more consideration, and you can adjust accordingly. If you haven’t done this before, then your list of values might be a work in progress; you might redefine it as time passes. If we follow the thinking that the values in Matthew 22:37–40 are at the center of all we say, do, and believe, the basis for our choices … then any values springing from those two commandments will be in harmony with each other.—Peter Amsterdam * Jesus said to him, “‘You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind.’ This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like it: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ On these two commandments hang all the Law and the Prophets.”--Matthew 22:37–40 * And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise.--Deuteronomy 6:6–7 Text courtesy of http://anchor.tfionline.com/post/values-life-lessons-and-truths/. Photo by Christine [cbszeto] via Flickr.
Being a new mother, I wasn’t sure what to do with my baby girl, Arwen, for the whole day. She is an alert child, and was quite active even as a small baby. For a couple of months I would put her on my hip and take her around the house with me throughout the day, but before long that had me bored, and unfulfilled in my care of her. I was determined to ensure that my daughter would be smart and not behaviorally challenged. I read a few books on teaching children during what they call the “window of opportunity,” from ages 0-5. I was amazed to learn how parents can teach their children so many things, provided that they are consistent and use appealing methods. I began looking for materials with which to teach Arwen —flashcards, books, and other educational materials—and some materials I personally made. I started teaching Arwen when she was three months old. After my initial fervor died, and I wasn’t seeing much progress as a result of what I was teaching her, I found myself discouraged. It seemed that she wasn’t reacting to the "schooling" I was giving her. I figured that perhaps she was too young to be learning words, numbers, and other things that I was trying to teach her. However, I continued, and after a few months, I started noticing that she was responding positively to aspects of my teaching that she recognized, which I had repeated to her many times over. Then one day just before she was seven months, after having shown her flashcards for quite some time with no apparent results, I showed her the word “clap” and without me saying anything she clapped her hands. I was completely stunned. I had hoped my efforts would pay off, but actually witnessing her response was incredible, especially at such a young age. Arwen is my first child, so every new venture in her progress is a wonderful experience for me. Perhaps I won’t be in such a perpetual state of elation with my next children, but for me this sign of progress was an encouragement to keep teaching her new things. Now I try to turn everything into a learning experience. I’ve read that the best way to teach children, besides making learning fun, is to make their life a rich learning environment. And she expects me to! Every time I pass a poster or word that I have posted for her, she gets so excited and expects me to make a big deal out of it and explain it to her. Sometimes I worry that I can’t keep up with her learning capacity, but I’m willing to keep trying to the best of my ability. I’ve experimented with ways to teach her things and have started to write them down in my notebook, so as to remember them for when she’s older. Here are some teaching opportunities I’ve been taking with her daily:
With the things I teach Arwen, I try to make learning fun, so that in the future she’ll look forward to her schooling as opposed to dreading it. Sometimes, however, she is not in the mood to learn, and wants to play by herself, which is also a part of her development, so I’m cautious to not overdo, and make sure I give her times when I’m not teaching her, too. I hope these ideas can be helpful to other new moms who are maybe looking for ways to pour into their little ones while they’re still babies. Article courtesy of Motivated magazine. Used with permission.
I look into [my children’s] faces and hear their melodious laughter and … I want more than the world for them. I want the eternal world for them. [Then] I jolt back to my own experiences and reality. The hurts… The pain from a divorce. The consequences of bad choices that are always forgiven but can still haunt me on the days I forget who I am in Him. I realize at this moment when the innocent and authentic collide that I can’t keep [my children] in a bubble. They’re going to be hurt... They will make bad choices. Much will change as they grow older, and unfortunately, it’s inevitable that the innocence will begin to chip away. But what won’t change? His truths. He was and is and is to come. He’s the same. Always. The comfort this brings me is overwhelming. So while I believe ALL of scripture is sacred and God-breathed, there are some verses I want my kids to have memorized before they leave my nest. 1. Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.”--Hebrews 13:5 2. For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.--Psalm 139:13–14 3. Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see.--Hebrews 11:1 4. Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.--Joshua 1:9 5. I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with loving-kindness.--Jeremiah 31:3 6. A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.--Proverbs 15:1 7. Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift.--Matthew 5:23–24 8. Therefore, if anyone is in Christ he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!--2 Corinthians 5:17 9. And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.--Romans 8:28 10. But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. — Galatians 5:22–231 —Natalie Snapp2 For illustrated Bible verses and chapters for children of all ages (including many of the ones mentioned above), check out the following links: Bible Verse Coloring Pages Feed My Lambs - Simple Bible Verses for Young Children The Beatitudes The Lord's Prayer John 1:1-14 Hebrews 11 (excerpts) Psalms for Children 1 The scriptures in this article are from the New International Version (NIV).
2 Excerpted from http://mommyonfire.com/2012/08/14/10-bible-verses-i-want-my-children-to-know. A certain amount of fear is healthy and understandable. It keeps us and our children out of harm’s way. We teach our children to fear running into a busy street, accepting candy from strangers, swallowing unidentified substances from the medicine cabinet, etc. We are, in essence, teaching them caution, which is quite different from dealing with a youngster who is responding to an imaginary rather than a real danger. Here are some common childhood fears, and ways to go about handling them. Fear of the dark Generally, fear of the dark occurs when the parents insist that the child stay in a totally darkened room at bedtime or when the child wakes up in the middle of the night. Some children are so terrified by the dark that their heartbeats actually increase. Parents need to recognize that the room looks totally different to the child when the lights are out, and should take steps to reassure the youngster even if the fear seems completely irrational to the parents.
Fear of the dentist. Clearly, for adults, this is often an unresolved fear from childhood, since so many adults are fearful of going to the dentist. It is usually provoked in children because they feel they have no control over the situation. It’s a fact of life that children do need to go to the dentist at regular intervals, so their fear must be dealt with and overcome.
Perhaps the kindest thing parents can do when dealing with a child’s fears is to admit their own childhood fears, especially if the parents had similar fears when they were children. The parents can indicate that they understand just how devastating such fears can be and that they stand ready to reassure and comfort whenever the child feels a need. Fear-busting Strategies Regardless of the child’s age, basic strategies for helping children cope with fears and phobias are similar:
Text and photo courtesy of Motivated magazine. Used with permission.
By Dina Ellens I didn’t appreciate it much when I was younger, but looking back now, I realize the influence my father’s faith in God has had on me. I have fond memories of standing next to his (at the time) towering 6-foot frame, listening to him wholeheartedly singing hymns in church. My family was from Holland, and my father’s favorite songs were in Dutch. After leaving home and striking out on my own, one particular song would come back to me, especially when I was feeling discouraged or worried. Roughly translated, it goes like this: A little ship under Jesus’ care With the emblem of the cross flying there. It rescues all in need, Even though the sea stands tall and high And the storms do threaten nigh. We have God’s Son on board, And safety in His ward. This song connects to memories of an adventure from my childhood: It was 1953, and my parents had decided to emigrate from the Netherlands to the United States. We crossed the Atlantic on an old ocean freighter that had been converted to carry passengers. My two brothers and I loved the thrill of being on board a big ship. We spent our days exploring and in no time made friends with all the crew members. I was only four years old, but I can remember the ship’s smell of oil and tar mixed with a sea breeze, and it still fills me with the same feelings of adventure and excitement I felt the day we boarded the freighter in Rotterdam. Just how much of an adventure we were in for, we had no idea. After several days, our ship was caught in a storm near the Sargasso Sea, at the center of the infamous Bermuda Triangle. The stormy turbulence churned up the abundant floating mats of an alga called sargassum, which then got tangled around our ship’s propellers. The ship suddenly lurched to one side, knocking over passengers and furniture. Thankfully, no one in my family was injured, but with the propellers rendered useless, our ship bobbed helplessly in the stormy ocean. My father took the three of us children to our cabin and tucked us into bed. I can better understand now what thoughts must have been going through his mind, as he thought of his young family getting caught in these treacherous waters where so many ships and crew members have been lost. Instead of caving in to fear, though, my father prayed with us and sang that particular hymn. Even though the waves were tossing our ship, and we were lost and directionless in the stormy night, I never felt frightened. In the morning, the sea was calm once again, and the crew was able to make radio contact with the nearest port. We soon welcomed the sight of a sturdy black tugboat chugging in our direction. The tug pulled our huge but helpless freighter to the harbor at Newport News, Virginia, where it stayed in dry dock for two weeks for repairs. My four-year-old mind retained some memories of the event, such as the ship’s sudden lurch that made me lose my balance and roll under some furniture, and especially the secure feeling I felt as my father prayed and sang so reassuringly. My father taught us faith by his example of trusting God no matter what circumstances looked like. Whenever life’s problems have seemed large and threatening like the waves of that stormy sea, I’ve sung that little song and have never failed to feel encouraged and reminded of my father’s faith in the midst of the storm. Courtesy of Activated magazine. Used with permission.
Christmas is for love. It is for joy, for giving and for sharing, for laughter, for reuniting with family and old friends, for tinsel and brightly decorated packages. But mostly it is for love. I had not believed this until a small elf-like student with wide, innocent eyes and soft rosy cheeks gave me a wondrous gift one Christmas. Mark was an 11-year-old orphan who lived with his aunt—a bitter middle-aged woman greatly annoyed with the burden of caring for her dead sister’s small son. She never failed to remind young Mark that, but for her generosity, he would be a vagrant homeless waif. Still, with all the scolding and chilliness at home, he was a sweet and gentle child. I had not noticed Mark particularly until he began staying after class each day (at the risk of arousing his aunt’s anger, I later found) to help me straighten up the classroom. We did this quietly and comfortably, not speaking much, but enjoying the solitude for that hour of the day. When we did talk, Mark spoke mostly about his mother. Though he was quite small when she died, he remembered a kind, gentle, loving woman, who always spent much time with him. As Christmas grew nearer, however, Mark failed to stay after school each day. I looked forward to his coming, and when, as the days passed, he continued to scamper hurriedly from the room after class, I stopped him one afternoon and asked why he no longer helped me in the room. “I miss being with you, Mark. Is something wrong at home?” Those large gray eyes eagerly lit up. “Did you really miss me?” “Yes, of course. You’re my best helper.” “I was making you a surprise for Christmas,” he whispered confidentially. With that, he became embarrassed and dashed from the room. He didn’t stay after school anymore after that. Finally came the last day of school before the holidays. Mark crept slowly into the room late that afternoon with his hands concealing something behind his back. “I have your present,” He said timidly when I looked up. “I hope you like it.” He held out his hands, and there lying in his small palm was a tiny wooden chest. “It’s beautiful, Mark. Is there something in it?” I asked, opening the top and looking in. “Oh, you can’t see what’s in it,” he replied, “and you can’t touch it or taste it, but Mother always said it makes you feel good all the time, and warm on cold nights, and safe when you’re all alone.” I gazed into the empty box. “What is it, Mark?” I asked gently. “What will make me feel so good?” “It’s love,” he whispered softly,” and Mother always said it’s best when you give it away.” And he turned and quietly left the room. So now I keep a small toy chest, crudely made of scraps of wood, on the piano in my living room, and only smile as inquiring friends raise quizzical eyebrows when I explain to them there is love in it. Yes, Christmas is for gaiety and mirth and song, for rich food and wondrous gifts. But mostly, Christmas is for love.—Laurie Courtesy of www.anchor.tfionline.com.
Christmas Games * Christmas A–Z praise. The first person thanks God for something that starts with “A,” which has to do with Christmas. The next person thanks God for something that starts with “B,” etc. See how far into the alphabet the children can go with their praises. * Wrap a scarf around your child’s eyes, so that he can’t see, and then have him draw something related to Christmas on a piece of paper (e.g., the manger scene, Joseph and Mary, the wise men, etc.). After each child finishes drawing his or her picture, have the other children guess what it is. * Play “Who Am I?” using only Christmas-related people and/or objects. A person thinks of a character or thing related to Christmas, and other players ask questions which can only be answered with a “yes” or “no,” and tries to guess from the information gathered who or what the person or object is. * Choose a Christmas word such as, “Christmas,” “caroling,” “nativity,” etc. Write the letters of the word you chose on little pieces of paper, then make two sets and put each word in an individual bag or bowl. Divide the children into teams. Give each team a set. The first team to decipher the word in the bag wins. * Divide the children into two teams. Prepare a list of five Christmas song titles. Each team sends up a representative who is shown a piece of paper with the name of a Christmas carol on it. That person returns to the group and needs to illustrate the title of the Christmas carol. No talking, gestures, or alphabet letters are allowed. As soon as a team has guessed the song, they must sing it as loud as they can. After singing, they send a new person for another song. Play continues until one group has guessed all five song titles. You will need pen and paper for each team. If your team is very large, you may need a white or blackboard, or a large piece of paper to draw on. Christmas Activities * Draw a simple, poster-size Christmas tree. Cut out circles and different shapes from colored construction paper to use as ornaments for the tree. The children can write short sentences of the things they enjoy about Christmas on the ornaments. Glue the ornaments on the tree and post it in a communal area. * Get a large piece of cardstock, title it “[your child’s name]’s Christmas To-do List” (e.g., “Jane’s Christmas To-do List”). Have your child draw a series of pictures illustrating what he or she would like to do to bring happiness to others this Christmas. Glue these pictures on to your child’s “To-do List” cardstock. Once all the pictures are added to the poster, decorate the list however your child would like. Place it up on the wall somewhere so that your child can remember what he or she would like to do for others. * Record the Christmas story. You could do this by reading the Christmas story out of the Bible (Luke 2), or dramatizing the Christmas story by creating your own script. You could even make it into a musical through using Christmas songs. * Create decorated cookie bags to be filled with yummy Christmas cookies to be given as presents. You’ll need:
Have the children decorate the paper bags in a Christmassy fashion using cutouts, paint, glitter, etc. Pipe cleaners can be used as handles or accessories. Some fun ideas to try out are: Cut ears out of the sides of the bag and fold them down, make antlers out of the pipe cleaners and paint a deer face on the front of the bag. Cut a Christmas tree out of green paper to cover the front of the bag. The children can decorate the tree with cut-out stars and baubles, add glitter, etc. Cut out three circles out of white paper and glue them onto the front of the bag making it into a snowman. Cut out little circles for buttons and eyes, a carrot shape for the nose, hat, scarf, etc. Cut out stars and glue them all over the bag, decorating them with glitter. * Make salt-dough gift toppers, or to use as tree decorations. You’ll need:
Directions: Make dough out of the salt, flour, and water. Knead the dough until it is smooth. If dough is too sticky, sprinkle with some more flour. Roll out the dough to about ¼ inch thickness using a rolling pin that has been dusted with flour. Use cookie cutters to cut out as many trees, stars, and Christmas shapes as you like. Use a toothpick to make a hole toward the top of the shape. Enlarge it a bit so it’s big enough to thread a small ribbon through. Put all the shapes onto an ungreased cookie sheet and place into the oven at a low temperature. Bake for two hours. Remove from oven and cool completely. Paint the trees green and the stars yellow, or with the color of your choice. When paint is dry, add glitter or any other accessories on the trees and stars. When dry, thread a ribbon through the hole and tie it in a knot in the back. Put these on top of little gifts you give to your friends, or use as Christmas tree decorations. * Create a pinecone Christmas tree. You’ll need:
Directions: Paint the pine cones green; paint the little pots gold. When the paint is dry, glue the pine cones in a conical fashion onto the top of the pots. Decorate the pine cones as you would a mini Christmas tree using glitter, sequins, etc., and place a star on the top. Text © The Family International. Photo courtesy of First Baptist Nashville via Flickr.
By Josie Clark As I rushed around the streets of Morelia, Mexico, the stoplights were crowded with beggars. It was Christmas Eve, and I had gone out with my 10-year-old daughter for some last-minute shopping. “Look at her!” Cathy drew my attention to an old woman who had stopped begging momentarily and was rubbing her cold, bare feet. “She’s someone’s grandmother,” I thought aloud, “but instead of being home with her family, she is out here in her bare feet, trying to scrape together a little money for Christmas dinner.” Then an idea struck me. “Cathy, let’s go home and get together some food for her.” It was already getting dark, so she probably wouldn’t be working that stoplight much longer. We raced home, found a couple of sturdy bags, and began going through our well-stocked pantry and refrigerator. Rice, beans, dried jalapeños, a jar of salsa, corn tortillas, a cooked chicken. It was easy to fill the bags from our abundance. A loaf of bread, jam, bacon. I tied the bags with large bows, and we headed off to find the old woman. At first we thought we had taken too long and missed her. Then we saw her trudging slowly down the street, her shawl wrapped tightly around her, probably on her way home. “Hello!” Cathy greeted her and continued in Spanish. “We saw you at the stoplight and brought you some food for Christmas dinner. We hope you and your family will feel God’s love this Christmas.” The old woman looked at us with wonderment, and tears welled up in her eyes. Then she took Cathy’s hands in hers and kissed them. “Thank you. Thank you. God bless you. You are beautiful. You are a Christmas angel.” She took the bags and continued down the street. Our own Christmas Eve was festive, as usual, and the next morning Cathy opened her gifts. When I asked her if she was having a good Christmas, she replied, “You know, Mommy, seeing that old woman so happy last night, and having her kiss my hands—that was the best Christmas present I got. I think giving is the best part of Christmas!” Courtesy of Activated! magazine. Used with permission.
Skin helps keep infection out of your body, so when it dries out and little cracks form, you’re literally more open to bacterial, viral or fungal infection. Here are some ways to prevent and speed—heal cold—weather skin problems. Wipe out dryness: The combination of colder outdoor temperatures and dry indoor heat makes dry skin (and the annoying itching it causes) almost inevitable. Preventative action:
Treatment tips:
Handle hangnails: If your child’s hands are dry, chances are he’ll have hangnails just begging to be chewed on or torn off. Preventative practices:
Treatment tips:
Beat chapped lips: Dry, flaky lips aren’t just annoying; in some cases, they can lead to cold sores. Preventative practices
Treatment tips:
Conquer cold sores: Once a kid has been exposed to the herpes virus, cold sores may recur. Preventative practices:
Treatment tips:
Courtesy of Redbook
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