1. Have set times of family devotions. Put some effort into planning this time so that it’s varied and fun and something to look forward to. (Editor's note: You can find some great, free Christian devotionals for kids of all ages at FreeKidStories and My Wonder Studio.) 2. Use the time that you study God’s Word together as an opportunity to pass on to your children your enthusiasm for learning and discovering new spiritual treasures. 3. Work together to adopt spiritual principles and habits. Use lots of positive reinforcement and make it fun, by deciding together on specific goals and rewards for achievements. 4. Pray together often—before meals, for safety on outings, for the day, and before bed. These prayers can be short and simple, and just a regular part of your everyday life. 5. Share your prayer requests with one another. Set up a “prayer board,” which lists needs and requests, and check them off as they are answered. You can also add verses that can be claimed in prayer. 6. Work on a Bible verse memory project together. Put up a chart listing everyone’s names and the memorization goal. Decide on a prize when the goal is completed. 7. Watch a meaningful movie or documentary together, and talk about it. Share your thoughts and perspectives and highlight any significant spiritual principles reflected in it. 8. Celebrate holidays in a way that acknowledges the true intent behind the special date or glorifies God in some way. (This can be done even with non-Christian celebrations.) 9. Foster a culture of sharing and giving to God and to others. Set aside your tithe as a family, and/or set aside extra gifts for special times of year. Decide together on whom you will give to, or come up with a project that will benefit those in need. 10. Hear from the Lord as a family for important decisions, or on matters that affect everyone. Discuss the situation and then ask the Lord for His guidance, and take a few minutes of silence to hear from Him. 11. Be an example to your children of godly values in action. Remember that they are observing your words and deeds, and will learn more from your daily example and actions than from all the admonitions you could give them. Text courtesy of The Family International. Used with permission.
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— By Jorge Solá My three year old son Manuel was playing an educational game on the computer when his six-year old sister Alondra demanded that he let her have a turn. Manuel’s response was typical. “I was here first!” I don’t know where Manuel picked that up, but it got me thinking. It’s a generally accepted principle of human society that those who “get there first” have more rights than those who get there after them. The first one to find a pearl in the sea, or strike gold or oil may claim it as his own. The first one to make a scientific discovery or invention may patent his find and claim any profits that may result. The first one to sit at a restaurant table has more right to it than the fellow who arrives later. The first one to settle in on a particular spot on the beach becomes the owner of that spot for the day. In my children’s case, if one of them has been playing for half an hour at the computer, I tell him or her that it’s time to let the other one have a turn. Most other parents probably do something similar. But if we applied that principle to every aspect of society, there would be absolute chaos. Can you imagine a landowner saying, “I’ve had this plot of land for quite a while, so it’s time to let someone else enjoy it”? Or can you imagine a man who has a good job giving it to someone else who is out of work and short of money? Those examples are rather extreme, but what about little acts of selflessness? How often do you see people who have a seat on the bus or subway offering it to able-bodied others who have just boarded, simply because they look like they’d appreciate a chance to rest their weary feet? Are little sacrifices like that too much to expect?—Or do we fail to make them simply because we don’t see anyone else making them and no one really expects us to do so either? It’s a matter of selfishness, when you get right down to it, and selfishness is part of our sinful human nature. But with God’s help we can break out of that mold, overcome our selfish first reactions, swim against the tide, and do the loving thing. If we give to him who asks of us, and if we don’t turn away from those in need, we will surely find that as we give, we will receive. Those are certainly revolutionary concepts in this day and age. If we would practice this kind of love, and teach our children to do the same, so many problems would disappear. The world would be a different place. Courtesy of Motivated magazine. Used with permission.
Compiled from parenting.com
There’s nothing wrong with store-bought playthings, but here are fun, stimulating things you can do better: 1. Reinforce the “Aha!” Think of your baby as a budding scientist and watch for moments of revelation: the smile in the bath that means “Yes! I get the rubber duck when I’m in the water!” The waving arms that translate as “When Daddy makes that face, I’m going to be tickled!” Fulfill your infant’s simple expectations and share her joy at being right. 2. Hold your baby upright when he’s alert. Infants see most clearly when they’re vertical, not horizontal. So prop him up in your lap to show him new objects, and hold him up to look over your shoulder when you take him on a tour of his brand-new world. 3. Develop facial as well as verbal dialogues. Well before babies can even baby talk, you’ll see your infant attempt to replicate your facial expressions. Make different faces and watch how her interest perks up. “Listen” and respond to her expressions. 4. Rock ‘n’ roll. To satisfy your baby’s craving for motion, waltz him around the room, swing him gently to and fro, bounce him slowly up and down, sit in a swivel chair and see how he takes to a spin in your lap. 5. Encourage tasting. Think of her mouth as a sensuous space probe, gathering data about her personal cosmos. Avoiding objects too small, sharp, or grimy, let her lick that soup spoon, gum that cup, or chomp on a bread crust. 6. Read aloud. Don’t worry about “big words.” Nursery rhymes, books—the more variations in language a baby hears in his favorite voices, the more captivated he’ll be. Choose some books with lots of repetitive language, which babies like for their predictability. 7. Sing—with or without words. Forget the lyrics to your favorite lullaby? Hum it. Musical notes without all those consonants and vowels are a simpler and often more soothing form of stimulation. Crisis events such as natural disasters, violent acts, and serious accidents are frightening to children and adults. It is important for parents, teachers, and other caretakers of children to know how a crisis can affect children and how to help them deal with the trauma. Children who experience an initial traumatic event before they are eleven years old are three times more likely to develop psychological symptoms than those who experience their first trauma as a teenager or later. Children’s ability to deal with a traumatic event is primarily dependent on the reaction of the parent or those who are in a caretaking role. As adults, we need to acknowledge our concerns to children in appropriate ways, but balance this with clear explanations of the ways we together can cope with the situation successfully. It is not helpful to falsely minimize the danger, or fail to sufficiently answer a child’s questions regarding what happened. It is important to invite them to process what they are hearing, seeing, and feeling by listening supportively without judging or correcting their feelings. They may need to tell their story repeatedly. Writing, drawing, and play are effective mediums for children to process trauma. Allow them many ways to tell their story. Just as for adults, children often need to process the event numerous times before they can move beyond it effectively. If after a few days the child’s symptoms continue to substantially interfere with his daily functioning to the point the child is not eating, sleeping, or able to perform typical daily tasks, professional consultation is warranted. This does not mean the behaviors, fears, or anxieties have to be gone, but you can see continued gradual improvement. Four to six weeks after the event there should be definite signs of improvement in the child’s ability to deal with fears or anxieties related to the trauma. The longer negative behavior continues without any improvement, the more difficult it will be to resolve. Getting help in a timely manner prevents more severe problems from developing. Seek help from personnel who have specialized training in treating children’s trauma, from medical staff, or professional counselors. Some responses to help children deal with a crisis:
Courtesy of Motivated magazine. Used with permission. Note to parent or teacher: Here’s a 20- to 30-minute lesson plan on courage when faced with doing right. It highlights the following lesson objective: Recognize the need for courage in facing and confronting difficult situations; see that courage is a decision to move past fear and to persevere in doing right.
The general target age for this lesson plan is 8 through 12. You can, however, adapt, simplify, or expound on this lesson plan to better suit your child’s comprehension level. * Read “A World with No Courage.” Discuss the importance of courage in your life and in the world around you. What professions can you think of that require courage? What actions in your child’s or your life require courage and the decision to be brave in spite of fear? Read “March Hero of the Month: Gideon” (along with the full story about Gideon in Judges 6 and 7), and “Heroes from History: William Wilberforce.” Talk about how these men were ordinary people, but both of them decided that they couldn’t stand by and do nothing while evil prevailed. While there might not be such an obvious display of evil in your child’s life, God’s commandments to love Him and others are the standard by which we live—and it sometimes requires courage to live by such a standard. List deeds of love that require courage. Read “Hot Dog.” The missionary who decided to do what God showed him to do acted with courage. He might have felt shy, or hesitant, but he had faith to follow God’s voice. Highlight that courage isn’t just about doing things that seem scary in order to act “courageous”; it’s about doing what God shows you to do. Read “Two Soldiers Conquer Thousands.” When we do what God shows us to do, He gives us faith and courage and providence for His will to be accomplished. Memorize “For I am the Lord, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you.” (Isaiah 41:13 NIV) Supplemental Material: Dealing with Dragons Moral Values for Children: Courage Florence Nightingale (Animated children’s video) Joan of Arc (Animated children’s video) Adapted from lesson plan by My Wonder Studio. Joseph Reader
Even entertainment can convey subtle messages. Dr. David Walsh, author of Selling Out America’s Children: How America Puts Profits before Values and What Parents Can Do, has identified six key values that dominate the mass media: 1. Happiness is found in having things. 2. Get all you can for yourself. 3. Get it all as quickly as you can. 4. Win at all costs. 5. Violence is entertaining. 6. Always seek pleasure and avoid boredom. The media’s emphasis on materialism and entertainment shouldn’t be surprising, of course. As much as 90 percent of our media content is ultimately owned by a handful of giant transnational corporations, including Time Warner, News Corp., Disney, Viacom, Vivendi, Bertlesmann, and Sony. Veteran media critic George Gerbner notes that, for the first time in human history, most of the stories about people, life, and values are told not by parents, schools, churches, and others in the community who have something to tell, but by a group of distant conglomerates that have little to tell and everything to sell. As a result, our 21st-century media is mainly supplied by a small number of large corporations whose primary concern is not our society’s health or our children’s well-being, but to maximize profits. In an interview with Zenit, a Catholic news service, screenwriter Clare Sera was asked how we are influenced by Hollywood without even realizing it. She replied: In every way. Every movie, each TV show leaves its influence — but we have great power over how we allow that to influence our hearts. Ms. Sera goes on to explain how important it is to discuss the underlying messages of a movie after you’ve watched it, especially with your children. Movies are good opportunities to bring up topics you might not think about around the dinner table. It’s a great way to open conversations with your kids about why you think such and such a movie has a bleak message, or a great message, and ask them what they think. And not just in movies. Parents have an opportunity at every turn to explain, “This is what Christ calls us to,” and “This is how the culture differs from Christ’s call.” And to show the difference between what looks pretty and what is truly beautiful—between immediate gratification and depth of soul. Between Britney Spears and Mother Teresa. In the end, the best protection against media bias and its effects is to be on guard about what we expose ourselves to, and limit its intake. Turning on the TV, or uncritically absorbing mass publications every day—these activities allow access to our minds by anyone who has an agenda, anyone with the resources to influence you via popular media. Your mind is worth guarding, and it’s worth your while to limit access to it. As the old saying goes, if you keep your mind too open, people will throw a lot of rubbish into it. ![]() Taken from Grow Up Reading (website) Emergent literacy: Use proper vocabulary when you talk to your baby. For example, say “toes” instead of “piggies.” This helps your child learn the rules of language with minimal confusion. Babies use gestures to communicate before they can talk. Encourage your baby to use simple gestures and signs (such as clapping for saying “please,” or touching their chest to say “thank you”), which can increase a baby’s understanding of language and accelerate language development. Help your baby hear the different sounds that make up words (phonemic awareness) by saying or singing nursery rhymes. Rhyming words share similar sounds—”dock” and “clock” in the classicHickory, Dickory, Dock, for example. Nursery rhymes place rhyming pairs of words in prominent positions to naturally draw a child’s attention to these sounds. By hearing pairs of rhyming words, babies begin to understand that words are made up of separate sounds, a critical reading skill. In addition to reading traditional picture books, use interactive books: books with flaps, textures, smells, and sounds to encourage exploration and stimulate your baby’s senses. Point to images on a page and name them; this helps increase vocabulary. Also talk about what is going on in the story; this helps develop comprehension skills. Use dialogic reading when you read aloud. The basic premise of dialogic reading is adults and children having a conversation about a book. Ask your baby “what” and “why” questions about the story, pause, and then answer your questions. Introducing this type of reading and questioning early will help your child become more comfortable with the process of dialogic reading when he or she is actually using words. Cognitive development: Play with toys that react, pop up, make noise or move to help your baby understand cause and effect. Between 9 to 12 months, most children will begin to play independently with toys and enjoy toys that react or make noise. Babies this age will begin exploring objects in many different ways (shaking, banging, throwing, and dropping) and begin to use objects correctly (shake a rattle, drink from a cup, listen to a phone). Play peek-a-boo games. Young babies have not developed a sense of object permanence—the understanding that unseen objects still exist. Start by hiding your face behind a blanket and then peeking out at baby. Put a scarf over your head and let your baby pull it off; hide objects underneath boxes and let your baby knock the box over to retrieve the object. Motor development: Give your baby plenty of freedom to move around on the floor. Young infants need to spend time on both their back and stomach in order to develop the muscles for the significant motor development that takes place in the first 15 months. Spending too much time in an infant swing or seat will hinder development of motor skills. Continue with lots of floor play as your child grows and begins crawling and walking. Add climbing challenges such as cushions, ramps, and tunnels to refine gross motor skills. Games that further develop hand-eye coordination and fine motor skills include building and knocking over block towers; covering and uncovering containers; taking toys apart and putting them back together again; picking up balls or objects in motion; turning knobs and pages of a book; scribbling and finger painting; and making shapes out of clay. Social and emotional development: Play finger and hand games like pat-a-cake and peek-a-boo; encourage your baby to imitate these gestures. Gesturing is a way babies communicate before talking. When you respond to your baby’s gestures, you reinforce his efforts to communicate. Sing songs with your baby. Music stimulates the cognitive and emotional areas of the brain. Encourage dramatic play through imitation of your actions in everyday activities—household chores, hobbies, entertaining, etc. Tell your baby what you are doing and prompt him to imitate you. Pretend play helps refine motor skills and foster a sense of accomplishment. Read books about daily routines such as brushing teeth, washing hands, putting on shoes, and taking a bath. These books encourage children as they prepare to learn and master these actions. ![]() What is unconditional love? It's just what the phrase implies—loving a person without any prior conditions, because of who the person is and not because of what the person does.--Zig Ziglar * Exceptional children are just that—exceptions. The vast majority of our children are not dazzlingly brilliant, extremely witty, highly coordinated, tremendously talented, or universally popular! They are just plain kids with oversized needs to be loved and accepted as they are.--James Dobson * Comparing yourself or your child from an analytical or critical point of view and wishing your child was this or that can steal your happiness, your inspiration, and your peace of mind and contentment, not to mention the effect it will have on your child. Children remember things very clearly and are directly affected by their parents’ attitude and how their parents feel and think about them. So if you’re constantly speaking faith and positive things about your child, either to him or to others, and if you’re thinking positive things about your child, this will have a good, faith-building, positive effect on your child, and he’ll likely become more like what you think of him and expect from him. But if you are thinking or speaking negatively about your child, either directly or indirectly, it can make him think negatively about himself and hinder his happiness and self-esteem, his performance, and the way he sees himself. Faith begets more faith; positive attitudes foster more positive attitudes in both yourself and those around you. It often takes showing faith in someone to bring out the best in them.--Jesus, speaking in prophecy * The spirit of approval means that you love your child even when he resists you or is in an ugly mood. He must know that his personal worth is not based on beauty, brains, or behavior, but on the simple fact that he is a person created by God.--Dan Benson4 * To build a relationship of love and respect, you must remember that your children respond to you according to the way they feel about you. If those feelings are ones of love and respect, you will receive obedient, loving responses from the children because that is what they want to do. … There's no real unity without respect.--Zig Ziglar * Children thrive on praise. It's more important to praise a child for his good works and his good behavior than it is to scold him for his bad behavior. Always accentuate the positive.--David Brandt Berg * Ways to show love and respect to children * Don't dismiss your child's feelings. Respond with love. * Don't command your child and expect him to come to attention without so much as an explanation. Approach him respectfully and lovingly when you need to ask a favor—trying to be sensitive and coming across with a considerate and sweet spirit. * Make eye contact with your child, and go down to your child's level when talking to her; for example, when you're telling her something or passing on instruction. * Take a little bit more of your time to slow down and really tune in to your child. Treat your child's ideas as important. Don't quickly shoot them down. If the idea is unreasonable, even though your child might not understand all the whys and wherefores, try to explain as much as you can. * Don't make fun of a child when he’s made a mistake or done something more on the silly side. This can really hurt his feelings. This doesn't mean that you shouldn't teach your child to learn to laugh things off when things go wrong, but pray for discernment, because sometimes your child may just need a moment of understanding. * When your child needs correction, help her not to feel embarrassed by correcting her as privately as the situation warrants. * Find a way to connect with each of your children individually. * Show your children that they're important to you by how you treat them. Give your children the same level of attention that you expect them to give you. * When your child comes to tell you something, stop and listen. Give her your full attention and respond to what she is saying. Don't listen halfway, while thinking about something else and continuing to do what you're doing. * Stop and acknowledge your child.--Maria Fontaine * Encourage your children’s unique qualities and characteristics: Know each child well as an individual. You can't help a child build confidence around his inherent gifts and talents unless you come to know what those gifts and talents are. Two ways to learn: (1) In private chats with the child, time spent together watching and appreciating; and (2) in organized time, spent as husband and wife, discussing each child, sharing perceptions, taking notes, discovering together more about the personality and individual character of each child. Genuinely respect each child and his own gifts. Our children are human beings, deserving not only our love but our respect. With this thought in mind, sometimes it becomes a bit easier to (1) show an added measure of faith in them after any kind of failure; (2) discuss our own failures with them and tell them what we learned; (3) praise their accomplishments lavishly and honestly, particularly accomplishments in areas where we perceive special aptitude; and (4) never criticize or tear down the children personally. Make sure they still know our total love for them. Never criticize in public—praise in public, correct in private. [Teach] independence, self-reliance, responsibility at an early age.Confidence and its joy tie directly into being able to do useful things. Each child should have a job in the family, for the family—particularly daily or weekly jobs—for which he is praised and made to feel very able and very important, very much a part of the family. Help the children to see what their own unique gifts are—and that these gifts are as good as anyone else's.--Linda and Richard Eyre * Your children depend on you to be an example of My love to them in a way that they can understand, grasp‚ comprehend, and feel. If you don't show them My love, how will they know that I love them? You are a manifestation of My love for them. Children are fragile in their emotions, even those who don't seem to show it as much, and I want to show them that I love them, that I care for them, and that I want to be close to them and do special things for them. Your love manifested in time spent with them is one of the biggest ways that a child feels My love through you. And just as I love you so dearly, so do I love them—more than you can imagine.--Jesus, speaking in prophecy Courtesy of http://anchor.tfionline.com/post/love-builds-children/. Photo by Stenly Lam / Flickr
Love is the cornerstone.
Differences must be overcome with love.
Parents, treat your children gently and in love.
Parents should govern their children with authority, tempered with patience, mercy, and truth.
All Bible verses from NIV and ERV, unless otherwise indicated. Originally created by Activated Magazine; used with permission. From Jesus with Love
Text courtesy of Activated! magazine. Photo by 123rf.com |
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